SAANVI'S POV

The oppressive darkness lifts, and I open my eyes. The first thing I see is her.

“Mumma.” I whisper, seeing her stand right there, the way I've only ever imagined her, the way she appeared in that single, fragmented memory I cling to.

A small, tremulous smile surfaces on my lips, perfectly mirrored on hers.

"Missed me?" she asks.

Tears immediately burn and blur my vision, but I manage to nod, a sharp jerk of my head. "A lot."

We simply stare at each other, letting the silent recognition fill the space. I drink her in, her eyes, the elegant curve of her nose, her soft lips, the blush on her cheeks. She looks ethereal.

"I made you wait, didn't I?" she asks and I nod again.

"I always wanted to be with you, Mumma, I've missed you all the time." I confess, a slight smile breaking through the misery. "Whenever I saw small kids clinging to their mothers, I just thought about how it would have been if you were here, if we could have been together."

Her hand lifts, pausing inches from my cheek, hovering near, not touching, just defining the space as if she were cupping my face in warmth.

"You're always in my dreams, Mumma. I still have you in my heart and in my mind." I whisper, tilting my head slightly toward the phantom touch. "I can never let you go."

"Then let's go," she says, her face bathed in a serene smile. "Come with me." She extends her palm toward me, offering me the greatest escape I’ve ever known.

A profound relief floods my heart. It's the end of the fight. With a broad, genuine smile, I raise my own hand, ready to finally reach her.

"Don't give up, Pearl. Please..."

My hand stops, arrested mid air, inches from her waiting, welcoming touch.

"Won't you come with me?"

I look at her, a painful lump forming in my throat, and swallow.

This is what I’ve craved, freedom from the relentless weight of my life, a return to my Mumma, and now it is one touch away.

But Rudra...

I slowly withdraw my hand. "I'm sorry."

"You don't want me now?"

I shake my head violently, tears pouring down my cheeks. "No! That's not it. But I can't leave. I finally found someone, Mumma." I suck a shaky breath in, fighting back the sobs. "He needs me, and... and I need him, too. He made me want to live, I can't leave him."

"Your prince?" She smiles, a lovely, understanding curve of her lips.

A small, tear filled chuckle escapes me, and I nod. "Yes. My prince."

She simply stares, scanning my face, absorbing the reality of my choice.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

"Thank you," she says.

I frown, confused.

"Stay happy, my precious," she murmurs.

My throat tightens unbearably. It hurts. I see her in my mind, in my sleep yet she is still so heartbreakingly far away.

"Always remember, I'm in you," she insists, the words sink into my core, a permanent comfort. "Living in you, seeing everything through your eyes, breathing through your nose, and smiling through your lips."

I close my eyes, letting the tears fall freely before opening them again. "In the next life... we will live together again, Mumma. You, me, Vikram bhai, and Dad. Together. Promise?"

She smiles. "I'll come back to you soon, my precious. I promise."

I smile through my tears. "I love you, Mumma. I love you so much."

"I love you too, my precious," she replies, a single tear slips from her own eye. "More than you can ever think."

"Maybe in the next life," I whisper, accepting the painful truth, and close my eyes, taking a deep, steadying breath of the air that belongs to the living.

----------------

A low, persistent ache in my abdomen pulls me up from the darkness. I force my eyes open, but the overhead lights are cruel, making me wince and squeeze them shut against the glare.

Finally, I manage to keep them open, and my gaze immediately drops to the figure beside the bed. Rudra sitting, hunched forward, my hand trapped between his, his forehead pressed down against it. He is resting on his elbows, and I can feel the cool, wet tears that have soaked my skin.

A small, tired smile forms on my lips. "How much longer are you planning to cry?"

His red, swollen eyes instantly snap to mine. He just stares for a few seconds, swallowing hard, his vision blurs with an immediate fresh welling of tears. His lips part, silently, as if his mind can’t process the mundane sound of my voice.

"I thought you would have already been planning to marry again, thinking I was dead..."

I don't get to finish the sarcastic jab. He leans over the rail, crushing me in a tight hug, burying his face in the hollow of my neck. What follows is not a sob, but a loud, guttural, heart wrenching cry that shakes his entire, rigid body. I manage to wrap my free arm around his back, my fingers finding the familiar line of his skull, and I rub his head gently.

"I'm right here. Calm down," I whisper.

"I was so scared. So terribly scared," he cries.

Choosing him is the best decision I made in my entire life.

He finally pulls back, his fingers tremble as they cup my cheeks, streaking them with his own tears. He leans into me again, placing a soft kiss on my left cheek.

I meet his gaze and smile gently. "Well, for your information, darling, I'm no longer new to Indian traditions and culture."

He looks confused, his brow furrowed, still wet with tears.

I press my lips together to stop the smile from growing too wide and run my thumb over his wet cheekbone. "Kissing only one cheek can get me bitten by a dog, you have to balance it." I tap my right cheek. "So balance it here, too."

A sound between a sob and a chuckle breaks from him, and he complies, placing a soft kiss on the other cheek. He then moves to kiss my forehead, both my eyes, and the tip of my nose, which makes me giggle slightly, before he finally settles on a gentle peck on my lips.

"Oh, fuck!"

We both flinch and he pulls back so quickly his chair scrapes the floor. Kabir is standing in the doorway, his mouth agape.

This piece of shit always spoils my moment.

"Excuse me," a new voice says, the doctor, standing behind Kabir.

"Oh," Kabir says, immediately stepping aside while throwing Rudra an exaggerated, scandalized look.

"How are you feeling?" the doctor asks, moving to check my pulse.

"Good. Just a slight, dull pain on the wound," I reply.

He nods. "For that I'm writing the prescription. Please ensure she follows this closely," he says to Rudra, who nods.

"How long does she need to stay here?" Rudra asks.

"Depends on how well she heals," the doctor replies.

"We need to get back. She can still be admitted at our place, so is it okay if we shift her? Is there any danger?" Rudra continues.

The doctor pauses, considering. "You can, but at least let her stay here for a few more days to ensure the internal healing is stable."

Rudra nods, accepting the compromise.

"Take care," the doctor says to me with a small smile, and then he leaves.

Abhimaan walks in just as the doctor exits. "You good?" he asks.

I give him a quiet smile. "Yeah."

"You're genuinely brave," he says with a small smile, then glances at Rudra and rolls his eyes with disdain. "And there's that scaredy cat. Crying like a small child."

I look at Rudra, who is just watching me, his hand still holding mine.

"Yeah, actually," Kabir affirms. "You know, Dhruv told me he was literally screaming, crying like a toddler." He clears his throat and then puts on a dramatic, bawling face. "'No! Please don't take her away from me! I want to be with her! Pearl!'"

Rudra immediately shifts his gaze, looking down at my hand in his, embarrassed.

I tighten my fingers around his palm, offering silent support, and fix Kabir with a glare. "You and Dhruv better stop making fun of him. If you don't, I promise you both will be the next guests in the hospital bed."

Kabir just twists his face. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever, gangster."

A knock makes all of us stop talking. I look up to see Avyaan stride in, he stops pointedly next to Abhimaan.

"Rudra," he calls. Rudra meets his gaze. "We need to talk to you about yesterday."

Rudra glances from Kabir to Abhimaan to Avyaan, the three of them operating in some kind of silent military shorthand. "Sure." He stands up squeezing my hand softly. "I'll be back."

I tighten my grip, not letting him pull away. "What is it? I want to know too," I insist. Being the one in the hospital bed doesn't mean I'm excluded from my own life's drama.

"Can you stop behaving like a child?" Avyaan scoffs. "And for your information, this is about our mission. You're not a member of our team."

"Avyaan," Rudra warns, his head tilting in that subtle, dangerous way. "You can't talk to her like that."

"Apologize." Abhimaan commands.

"Let it be, Abhimaan," I interrupt, giving Avyaan a bright, saccharine smile. "I don't mind the manchild. I'm used to dealing with people who skipped basic social development."

Abhimaan sighs. "Okay. Let's get serious for a second."

"Yes. Serious," Kabir says, straightening up and pulling a comically stern face, though his eyes are still twinkling with mischief.

"It's about yesterday," Abhimaan starts, looking mainly at Rudra but flicking his eyes at me.

"Did you find Yashwant and Saarth?" Rudra asks, immediately focusing on the threat.

Kabir shakes his head. "No, not them. But something really weird."

"Weird?" Rudra frowns, sensing the gravity shift in the room.

Abhimaan nods. "After Saanvi and you left the area, the whole team and I were investigating the site and..." He trails off.

"And?" I press, sitting up slightly, ignoring the pull on my stitches.

"We found eleven dead bodies," Avyaan replies, his gaze, and the gaze of the other two landing squarely on me.

My eyes widen in genuine shock. "What... eleven dead bodies?"

"Yes," Avyaan says, his blue eyes piercing, making the accusation explicit.

"Wait!" I snap. "Are you actually doubting me?" I throw a baffled look at Rudra, who seems just as confused. "I didn't kill anyone, I swear! Yes, at the temple, there was one man coming at me, and I did slam a sculpture on his head to knock him out, but I never wanted to kill anyone." I spill the facts out quickly, needing to establish the clear limits of my violence.

Rudra immediately steps closer, cupping my cheeks and giving me the most loving, dark smile. "It's okay even if you killed them, love. Frankly, you probably deserve an award. Don't worry, I'm here. I will handle everything."

I shake my head. "No, that’s not the point, Rudra. I didn't kill anyone. And come on, I don't even know how to hold a gun properly! The one bullet I shot at Yashwant was only because the gun was already loaded." I feel a surge of furious disbelief. "I'm being serious I didn't do this. Who the hell is out there, loose, making it look like I did?"

"They aren't dead by bullets, Doctor," Kabir interjects, shifting the conversation back to the evidence.

"Then what?" Rudra asks, leaning back.

"They were poisoned."

"What?" Rudra and I say in unison, staring at Abhimaan.

He nods. "Yes. We recovered eleven dead bodies. All of them showed signs of severe systemic distress, specifically frothing at the mouth. That foam was present on the man Saanvi hit at the temple, as well as the bodies we retrieved from the forest and near the village boundary."

"Is it possible they were bitten by an insect, or maybe a snake?" Rudra asks trying to rationalize the horrific number.

"There are many people living in that village," Avyaan counters immediately. "How is it possible that suddenly those particular men were found dead by some random snake or insect? It makes no sense."

"Right. It's not a snake or an insect," Kabir confirms. "Someone deliberately killed all those men."

Rudra tilts his head. "But the point is why? It's genuinely strange that someone else was present there. Was that person helping us, or maybe do they also have a rivalry with Yashwant?" He looks at his team. "Did you find anything else?"

Kabir nods slowly. "Yes. There were distinct nail marks on all the dead men. Some had them on their necks, others on different parts of their bodies."

My mind suddenly flashes back to the darkness of the forest. "I... I think I saw that man," I whisper, and all three men focus their attention on me instantly.

"You saw him?" Rudra frowns, leaning closer.

I nod. "Yes. Actually, when I was running in the forest after seeing some of the guards following me, I ran deep into the trees, and before any other guard could catch me, a man pulled me behind a large tree trunk."

"He saved you?" Kabir asks, sitting on the visitor's chair.

I nod again. "Yes."

"Did you see his face?" Abhimaan asks.

I shake my head, disappointed in my own lack of detail. "No. He was all covered up, top to bottom. Not even a single piece of skin was visible."

The men collectively sigh in frustration.

"But," I add, remembering the one detail that stood out in the dark, "he had green eyes." All of them look at me again.

"Green eyes?" Rudra repeats.

I confirm it. "Yes. He had green eyes. I even watched him fight with those two guards in the forest. But what was weird is that both the guards suddenly collapsed while fighting, and when I looked closer, that froth was forming around their mouths." I explain the scene I witnessed, which now makes horrifying sense.

"Did you hear his voice?” Avyaan asks.

I shake my head. "No. He actually didn't say anything, but he didn't leave me either. He pointed in the direction of the outside of the village from the forest. But I was hesitating to trust him, so he..." I stop, flushing slightly under their combined stare.

"He what?" Kabir urges.

"He suddenly came closer and kissed my cheek—"

"He did what?!" Rudra suddenly roars, scoffing in furious disbelief.

"He kissed my cheek—" I tried to repeat, but he cut me off.

"That fucking jerk!" Rudra grits out, his hand flying up to run aggressively through his hair. "Now that fucking green eyed guy is the fourth man on my list of people to kill."

I frown in confusion. "The fourth?"

"Who's the third?" Abhimaan asks, just as confused.

"No, wait, I don't even know who the first and second are." I interrupt, needing to get the priorities straight.

Abhimaan looks at me. "The first is Yashwant."

"Second is Saarth," Avyaan adds.

"And the third is Dr. Neil," Kabir finishes smirking at Rudra.

"Dr. Neil? Saanvi's friend?" Abhimaan asks, frowning at Kabir.

"He's not her friend," Rudra snaps immediately. "Stop making any shit face her friend."

"Stop now," I say firmly, already frustrated by the ridiculous possessiveness.

"Yeah, leave Dr. Neil for now because I need to find out who the fuck this green eyed man is." Rudra scoffs, utterly distracted.

"That's not our case, Rudra, let's not distract our focus," Abhimaan says, trying to pull him back to the original topic. "Our primary target is Yashwant and Saarth, so let's stick to that."

"Yeah, and besides, that green eyed guy actually helped me," I argue.

"He helped you, but he absolutely did not need to kiss you." He mutters, his eyes narrowed with annoyance.

"But wait," I say, my eyebrows arched at him. "First, answer the basic question, how did you find me? I need to know how you manage to track me down, every single time."

He swallows, his gaze flicking away from mine, resting somewhere near my shoulder.

"Yeah, Rudra," Kabir jumps in. "Tell your wife exactly how you always know her precise location."

He forces a small smile. “You underestimate my love and obsession—”

“Rudra.” I glare.

"Uh... well," he mutters, subtly wiping a sheen of sweat from his forehead. He forces himself to meet my gaze. "Your watch has a tracker fixed in it. It's called the G-22V. It transmits your exact coordinates, and I can also remotely activate the microphone to hear you if I need to."

My jaw drops. "You... you were stalking me all this time?" I scoff.

"No, no, Pearl, it's for your protection," he insists, holding his hands up defensively and taking a small step back from the bed. "I never meant to invade your privacy, I swear."

I stare at him. "We just read those few stalking stories together, Rudra. You didn't have to follow them like a guidebook."

"Is stalking that bad?" Kabir asks suddenly. We all turn to look at him.

He shrinks slightly under our collective gaze, forcing an awkward chuckle. "I mean, I was just asking. I don't think it's that problematic, if the intentions are good."

"It is," Avyaan states. "You cannot unilaterally invade someone's privacy, and it is a complete violation, especially because there was no consent."

Kabir forces a tight smile and nods, looking down at his hands. "Yeah. Right."

I look back at Rudra, who is staring blankly at Kabir. Kabir looks up, meets Rudra's intense gaze and immediately looks away.

I frown because Kabir, who is usually playful and mocking, looks suddenly distressed and small. The usual light in his eyes is completely absent.

"Won't you ask your husband when he decided to fix the G-22V in your watch?" he says, deliberately handing me the ball. I turn back to Rudra.

"Yes. When did you actually do it?" I ask.

He opens his mouth, closes it again, then takes a deep, ragged breath. "When you were about to go on that date with Neil."

The sheer accumulation of shocks is going to kill me before Yashwant ever gets the chance.

"Are you serious?" I ask, scoffing again.

"Yeah," he replies. "That’s why I put it there."

I shake my head, utterly drained. I can't even find the energy for the argument right now. Logically, stalking is awful, a violation of trust. Emotionally, the man is sitting here, terrified and relieved, and the damn tracker is the reason I'm here at all.

• After a Week •

"You should rest, Saanvi," Maa says as she slides a hand over my hair. She sits beside me on the bed, and the comforting scent of sandalwood and incense wafting off her, the scent of the pooja happening downstairs in the Singhania mansion.

I smile, holding her soft palm. "Bappa is leaving soon, Maa. I should go say a small goodbye."

She chuckles. "It’s a miracle, honestly. You saying goodbye to Bappa. I remember how much you despised the noise and the fuss."

I offer a small shrug.

"By the way, you look so beautiful," she says and I look down at my outfit, an ivory and gold Indo Western combination, the fitted corset top and my long skirt spread out over the white sheets.

"Thank you."

She leans forward, her brow furrowed in concentration, and dips her finger to rub a small smudge of black kohl from her own eyelid onto the side of my neck, a ward against the evil eye.

A swift knock on the door, and Rudra enters. He's also in traditional clothes, looking handsome and oddly domestic.

"Mom, I'll take over. You go," he says, approaching the bed. "Dad was asking for you downstairs."

"She wants to go too," Maa informs him, and he instantly looks at me.

"Let's not, Pearl. Your wound still hasn't healed properly. The doctor was clear."

I shake my head, tired of being confined. "It's fine, Rudra. It’s just downstairs in the hall. I want to be there, please."

"Don't be ridiculous, Rudra," Maa intervenes, standing up. "She's been cooped up for a week. If she wants to go, how can you deny her this? It's just a few minutes."

"Mom, you are not understanding the seriousness of—" he starts.

"Fine!" I snap, cutting him off.

He sighs, a deep, defeated sound, shaking his head slightly. He walks to the side of the bed, then, without another word, he leans down, slides one hand under my knees and the other securely behind my back, and scoops me up into his arms.

I gasp, startled, and instinctively wrap my arms around his neck. "Rudra!"

"How could I possibly deny you?"

"That's like my son," Maa says, beaming proudly as she heads for the door.

We share a small, private moment of laughter before he carries me out.

He carefully lowers me to the marble floor in the grand entrance hall, but he doesn't fully let go, keeping one strong hand firmly on my waist. I look past him to the beautiful altar where Lord Ganesha, is decorated with mountains of fresh marigolds, roses, and sweets.

I fold my hands together, closing my eyes.

Thank you Bappa for giving me this second chance, for steering me back to the light and to the people who love me. I promise you, next year, when you return, I won't just welcome you, I'll welcome you into a life that is truly mine, a life I am finally ready to cherish and share. I will spend that time with you, fully present, healed, and happy, just like I was always meant to be.

RUDRA'S POV

I step out of the hospital and head toward the parking garage, my phone buzzing against my palm. I pull it out, seeing her text instantly.

My pearl❤️: Then stay away permanently so that it becomes your habit.

I look at the screen, a direct, challenging reply to my last message.

Me: I hate staying away from you.

I click my tongue against my teeth and start typing as I walk.

Me: Impossible. My heart has a GPS, and it only tracks you.

I send it and watch the screen for a reply, but nothing comes. I stop next to my car, gripping the door handle, just as her name flashes across the screen.

I press my lips into a knowing smile and answer. "So, my last message was so effective you couldn't resist calling me." I lean back against the cool metal of the car.

I hear her gentle, rolling chuckle.

God, that sound. It fills my chest so completely I have to close my eyes, just for a second, to savor the unique texture of her voice. Every word she speaks is a gift. I am completely obsessed with this woman. The only thing in my mind is crushing her in my arms, kissing her skin, burying myself in her warmth, holding her so tightly she can feel how close I came to losing everything.

"You flirt a lot," she says.

"Is that a problem?" I ask.

"If it is, will you stop?" she challenges.

I can’t help but laugh. "I'll flirt harder."

"Can you be normal for once?"

I tap my fingers lightly on the car roof. "Not possible. I saw you and forgot what normal feels like."

"Okay, that's not the worst thing you've said," she concedes.

"Wait, I'm not done," I say quickly. "I also forgot how to breathe, so you might need to get on top of me and do mouth to mouth.”

"Rudra!" she yells, but it's swallowed by a loud burst of laughter. "God! You... I'm so red right now."

"Like your lips?" I prod. "Those taste so damn good. I'm coming right now, you better prepare my dessert." I meant every word. I'm going to devour her.

"Yeah, well, I'll bite your lips so hard that I can taste you too," she shoots back instantly.

I smirk, loving the fire she throws back. "Kinky. I'll take that as preparation." 

"You know what, I'm hanging up," she says chuckling. "Just come back soon."

"As you demand, my love." I say. She murmurs a "bye" before the line cuts.

I smile and slide the phone back into my pocket before turning to open the car.

"You look really happy."

I snap my head up, and the peace I just felt talking to Pearl is instantly obliterated.

"You know, you can keep this pathetic little life going if your wife just chooses to leave, and you stop poking your nose into my affairs."

My fists clench, my entire body fills with rage. "You really have the fucking nerve to show your face to me, Yashwant."

"Yes—"

I launch myself forward and deliver a heavy, brutal punch that connects squarely with his jaw. He stumbles back, hissing in pain, but quickly straightens up, wiping the blood from his mouth with a sneer.

"Showing power today? But that day you were a sniveling little bitch, begging and crying," he spits, his eyes alight with malice.

I step toward him, grab his collar, and slam his head onto the hood of my car. I wrench his arm behind his back, deliver a hard, precise kick to his spine, and watch him collapse to the pavement. I stand over him, my breath coming fast and ragged, bending down until our eyes meet.

"Even if I was crying," I snarl, grabbing a handful of his hair, "I can proudly say my wife fought off dicks like you and your worthless son all by herself." I release his hair and straighten, reaching for the car door to grab my gun. "You know what? You actually came at the perfect fucking time. This is your last day. I'll finish you right here and end this bullshit."

"Go on," he coughs, weakly pushing himself up. Blood streaks his face, making him look feral. "If you kill me, I'll at least die as a reputed man. I've lived my whole life, Rudra, and I enjoyed every damn minute." He gives me that sickening, predatory smirk. "Only Suhana was the one I couldn't completely possess, but Saanvi is still there, maybe she could—"

I'm on him before the final syllable is out. I slam my fist into his cheekbone and grip his throat with both hands, squeezing. Pure, red, blinding rage takes over.

"Dare to complete that sentence, you piece of shit," I growl. "I will fucking chop off your manhood and shove it in your goddamn mouth."

His face turns a deep, alarming red under my pressure. He claws at my hands, his eyes wide with a genuine terror that fuels my grip.

"Die, you fucker," I whisper against his ear, squeezing harder.

"Rudra!"

A sharp, unexpected force tears my hands away. I look up, my vision still spotty with rage, and see Neil.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" He shouts, his hands immediately helping Yashwant, who is leaning over, hacking violently. "Are you okay, Sir?" He asks Yashwant, then spins back to me, his face twisted in disbelief. "Are you out of your mind? What in God's name do you think you are? A fucking street thug? A gangster? Or a cop?"

"Much better than that," I reply looking over Neil’s shoulder at Yashwant. "And you will find out soon enough. I promise you, you will regret every single thing you ever did to cross me and my wife."

"You absolutely cannot threaten someone like this, I will call the—"

"Shut that ugly, condescending mouth!" I bellow at Neil. "I'm not even giving a damn about your fucking existence, why the fuck do you keep involving your useless ass in my business?! Has anyone told you how incredibly irritating and fucking worthless you are?!"

He scoffs. "I genuinely don't understand how Dr. Saanvi stays with you. You're a fucking psychopath and a sick, arrogant bastard."

I step closer, yanking his collar so fast his feet leave the ground for a second. "Listen here, you pathetic jerk. I don't give a flying fuck what you call me. But if I hear my wife's name from your sanctimonious mouth one more time, I will personally show you exactly why I earned both those fucking terms." I snarl, then shove him backward, making him stumble clumsily.

"What an insecure man," I hear him chuckle, adjusting his collar. "Is it maybe because Saanvi gives more attention to me? And frankly, hates you?"

I stare at him. My palm feels freezing cold, yet the thoughts racing through my mind are molten lava. I want to silence this bastard permanently. I picture stitching his mouth shut and slamming a hammer repeatedly onto his head. The desire to kill is overwhelming.

"Your life expectancy is rapidly reducing, Neil," I say. "You absolutely will die one day." I turn my back on them both, walking toward my car and focusing entirely on regulating my breath. Killing them here would be a gift. Yashwant doesn't get that easy out, he is right, he needs to be exposed globally, and Mrs. Malhotra deserves justice. If he dies, that's over.

As for Neil, he’s next. After Yashwant is neutralized, that idiot will be the very next target on my list.

--------------------

I see her the moment I step inside the bedroom, and the tension that had been a physical knot in my stomach instantly dissolves. She’s propped up on the bed, half sitting against the pillows, working on her laptop which is balanced on her lap. She’s wearing a soft tank top and shorts, and her hair is haphazardly gathered in a topknot, a few strands curling near her face.

I take a deep, stabilizing breath and manage a smile. She looks up and starts to move, intending to get up to greet me.

"No. Wait," I stop her immediately. I walk around to the other side of the bed. She sets the laptop aside on the nightstand, and I simply drop down, putting my head directly on her thighs. She immediately begins running her fingers through my hair, gently scratching my scalp, and I close my eyes. This is it. This is the only safe place left in the world. The scent of her skin, clean and floral, is a drug. I never want to move.

"I think you need to learn how to use a gun," I say, opening my eyes to look up at her.

"I can’t, Rudra," she replies. "I don't have the temperament for it. It feels wrong."

I hold her palm softly, bringing it to my lips, tracing the lines on her skin. "You need to, Pearl. We will move back to the main residence and after a few more weeks, once your incision is completely healed, your training will start."

She sighs, a sound of weary acceptance, and nods. "Is everything okay? You look like you've been in a fight."

I shake my head, dismissing the violence. "Just need my dessert."

She raises her eyebrows. "Really?"

I gulp, staring intently at her lips, which is covered with gloss, shining under the light. "Yes. I need that."

She leans closer to my face, her eyes holding mine. "How much?" she whispers, her lips mere inches from mine.

I breathe in the sweet cherry flavor of her lip gloss. "Please." I mutter, the word a genuine plea, raw and desperate.

She closes the small space and presses her soft, warm lips onto mine.

I grip the back of her head, pulling her in slightly closer to deepen the kiss. She tastes exactly as sweet as I'd anticipated, a perfect, exquisite counterpoint to the bitterness in my soul.

She breaks the kiss, leaning back, looking down at me with a soft, indulgent chuckle. "You look great with lip gloss on, you know."

I smile, my thumb rubbing the smooth, bare skin of her thigh. "Let's be more specific. I look good wearing the gloss you just kissed onto me."

______________________________________________________________________________

Daily journal

I realized a truth when you were in the hospital. I had given up on my life once because I thought you didn't want to stay with me. But now you do, and that thought alone feels like a second chance at life itself.

You have no idea what that means to me. The moment I saw you lying there, fragile and pale, I felt something inside me break. I don't ever want to exist in a world where your eyes don't open again. And I won't. Because if life ever dares to take you from me, I swear I will follow you. Not as a promise, but as a truth carved into my bones.

I'm not strong enough to let you go Pearl. I need you like breath, like heartbeat like the only constant that keeps me human.

You said you are scared to be without me. You don't need to be. Not in this life, not in the next, not even in the afterlife. I will find you again even if I have to crawl through death itself to reach you, I will.

My life is not separate from yours it moves when you move, stops when you stop. If your story ends, mine collapses with it. I was never meant to outlive ve you Pearl. I was meant to love you fiercely.